I could maybe be a threat... Honest... Not in bad way though...

I guess it is good that women do not see me as threatening…  But come on…

True, when you work in theatre, there is often not a whole lot of room for modesty in the dressing room or backstage.  Quick changes have to happen, as the name implies, very quickly. You don’t always have separate dressing rooms.  You have to change clothes where ever you have space to do so.

Also true is the fact that many men involved with theatre are gay.  This often makes many women more comfortable when making quick changes.  However, I am proof that not ALL men involved with theatre are gay.  I always thought that was odd that the stigma was theatre=gay, sports=straight.  To me: Playing sports means hanging out with a bunch of dudes and maybe some cheerleaders if you are lucky.  Working in theatre means hanging out with a bunch of girls (as well as guys), and often getting to dance with the girls.  Not to mention being around quick changes and various costumes with varying amounts of the body being revealed...

As a straight male, I prefer the latter of the two.

That being said, some women do prefer to keep some bit of modesty when they can which is understandable.  If it is not a quick change, keep the door to the dressing room closed, not having everyone running in and out as they please.  Sometimes this is not wanting to give the creepy dudes a free show if there is that feeling.

One time, while working with a production of The Rockettes, I was returning some costumes from some quick changes after the show.  I politely knocked on the door instead of just barging in with the costumes.  The response from inside was, ‘Come in if you’re gay!’.   I informed them that it was Seth.  They proceeded to say that it was fine that I enter. 

WHAT?  Either I was giving off the impression that I was gay or they did not see me as a threat and knew that I would not gawk.   (I hope it was the second option but either way...  Come on...)

In a more recent situation, someone decided to open the door to the dressing room with minimal clothing on.  I believe in an attempt to embarrass me or get a reaction from me.  They did not succeed so they proceeded to jump up and down and say that they were ‘naked’.  This I disagreed with.  Naked would require even fewer clothes on that what she did have.  

In reality many people show more at the beach than they do in their underwear so it really is not a big deal... 

More recently still, the same female, while in a housing situation, did not seem to have a problem walking about with minimal clothing.  Not the whole time, just while getting ready but still.

Now I am not saying I want women to feel uncomfortable around me to the point where they need to wear a burqa.  But at least see me as a guy who will enjoy seeing minimal or no clothing, and I am not as safe as a guy who has no interest what-so-ever in what she has to offer…

So feel free to prance around almost naked if you want but don't expect a reaction from me when in a work situation.  

If it is not a work situation I will probably enjoy it (despite my feelings on strip clubs) but it is not nice to tease people...

Then swore I that I was a stranger here. B

Continuing from where we left off...

Amsterdam:

I tried to walk under the ship.

Amsterdam was our home port and one of the few European ports in which you could easily walk into town from the ship and I was pretty comfortable with my surroundings.

In Town

Turn left: Red Light District

Turn right: town.

Not in RLD but a very interesting
advertising technique...
Would never happen in the US...

Yes, I did venture into "The District".  How could I not, being in Amsterdam.  Kind of un-nerving, women throwing themselves at me from their little windows.  This is a rarity for me with or without windows.  And, lets be honest, we were there in the morning mid week...  I was probably not seeing the A or even the B squad.  

This particular day, I was enjoying the weather and wandering around.  Again, I was comfortable in the area and did not think I would have an issue getting back to the ship.

However, the Dutch did not receive the memo about the streets in a grid formation either.  I got turned all around.

Fortunately they are much more open to speaking English.  I showed several people my ship ID and asked where to find the ship.  I got vague directions from several people and finally saw the top edge of the ship.  I only had to get across the train tracks and elevated road.  

I see a road that appears to go underneath the railroad tracks complete with a little walk way on the one side.

I proceed into the 'small' tunnel.  I am walking along and do not get to the end of the tunnel.  

I begin to walk faster.

My 'logic' is that if I am going to get/be lost, I would rather get somewhere sooner rather than later.

As I am walking the drivers begin to honk at me but I proceed on my path.

Yellow/Orange lights begin to flash and there is a announcement over the loud speaker.  In Dutch, obviously.  Does not really help me.  A little bit more walking and there is more honking lights and Dutch.  Still not helping.

I realize I have a pursuer.  A nice gentlemen in uniform catches up to me and asks where I am trying to go.  I explain my situation and he just shakes his head and escorts me back the way I had come to a little doorway.  We take an elevator up to street level and I am right by the ship...

The way I figure it, I was under the ship/later attempting to make my way across the bay to the other side.

I thanked the nice man and proceeded to get my butt back on the ship.  This time with about 15 minutes to spare...

Alaska: 

I almost missed the ship...

The town of Ketchikan asked the ship if we would like to be in the fourth of July parade as we were in port on the fourth.  We agreed but was basically required for myself along with a couple of other entertainment personnel on board. (This may have been the cruise in which I got into a big fight over a Canada Day/Fourth of July party...  It got ugly...  Maybe a later blog...)

The provided us with a flat bed truck in which we could build a float.  We had a fabricated smoke stack complete with one of our foggers from the theatre, a bunch of people to ride on and walk along side during the parade, and some speakers and music that we would play.

We were all set up and ready to go when we were informed of two key things. 

1) The start time of the parade was moved back a little bit.

2) Our position in the parade was moved back.

A combination of these two factors was going to make it very tight for us to get back to the ship when we were done.  The officials assured us that we would be fine.  Of course they were not the ones operating the ship...

We had the Cruise Director, Production Manager, AV Manager (me), and the Lighting Tech on this float.  When we were done, we were past the all aboard time for crew and quickly approaching the all aboard for the guests (meaning the ship would be pulling away and leaving).

The nice folks in Ketchikan offered to hold onto all our equipment until the next week but we weren't exactly comfortable with that.

Our flat bed driver came to the rescue.  He proceed to race through the small streets of Ketchikan (sometimes down the wrong way on a one way), to get us back to the ship.  He races up to the dock and security has removed the rails of the gangway, broken down all the scanners and metal detectors.

We were the last four people to get back on board.

As soon as we got up the ramp they were pulling it in and we started pulling away from the dock.

If you are ever on a cruise - BE ON TIME.  THEY WILL LEAVE WITH OUT YOU!  It does not matter who you are, except maybe the Captain.

Not the only adventures I have had in my life but they kind of stand out...

Then swore I that I was a stranger here. A

As I have previously mentioned, I have had the opportunity to travel quite a bit.

Traveling to a foreign country can be difficult.  When you don't speak the language of that land, navigating it can be difficult.  I would say if you were going to spend any length of time in one area, learn the language.  If I had been able to learn ALL the different languages of the lands that I was going to be visiting, it would have been very intense.  Although I visited each port several times, I was never spending an extended period of time in any one port.  The longest would be Germany for a few weeks and it was quite tough not knowing too much German.
However, if I were to move to Mexico, I would learn A LOT more Spanish.  Likewise, if someone moves here to the United States, they should have a strong grasp of the English language.
I applaud anyone who is able to to communicate in more than one language with little or no difficulty.  Being bi-lingual is very cool.

I am getting a little of subject.

As promised, I will know tell regale you with some of my adventures I have had.

France:

They DO NOT want to speak/understand English even if they know it...

I was not too excited when the itinerary included France.  Partly because the company would say that the ship stops in Paris, when this was not the case.  The stop was actually La Havre.  It was an additional two and a half hour train ride to get to Paris.
I was not planning on making the additional trip to Paris.  I would just hit the mall in La Havre.  I do not speak French except for a few small phrases.  I could just as easy not be understood in La Havre as I could in Paris without the extra expense.
The more I thought about it I figured, "when will I get to go to Paris?", so I decided to throw caution to the wind and take the trip.  I had no idea which way to go when I got there...

Upon arrival, the first order of business was lunch.  As mentioned, not knowing the native language, I headed for the familiar golden arches to get some food.  I figured, if nothing else, I could order like they suggested in Pulp Fiction.
"One Royal with Cheese meal please!"
Blank Stare
"Quarter Pounder?"
Smile and nod and I proceed to pay the insane prices after conversion from USD to EU.  (Much disappointment brought to me by Quentin Tarantino that day.)

After wandering around, seeing some cool architecture and what I am pretty sure was an announcement for a public hanging, I happened to stumble across the Louvre.  The courtyard was HUGE!  Then when I got to the far end of it, there was the Eiffel tower.  It did not appear to be far away but looks can be deceiving so I chose to head back to the train station.

Sound easy?  IT WAS NOT...  Apparently no one told the French (or any of the Europeans) that it is much easier to make streets in a grid formation.  I was pretty much lost.

I then proceeded to ask people (very humbly, not 'cocky American') where the train station was.  I even had a nice little prop, a train schedule I had picked up prior to leaving the train station. I mostly received a silent shrug from the various Parisians.
If I remember correctly, I even had found the McDonalds so I knew I was close.
When I finally found the train station, I discovered it was right on the same block and across the street from MANY people I had asked...

I then made the trip back to La Havre only to discover that the shuttle to go from town back to the ship was done.  I was on my own to get back.  (Here we go again.)
Fortunately I found a bar with some younger people and a fast food place Quick Burger?  Maybe another McDonald's in which they were able to call me a cab to take me back to the ship.

After my excellent cabbie got me back to the ship with about 30 minutes to spare before all aboard (cutting it VERY close for me), and me showering him with the Euros I had left, I made it back to my tiny room and collapsed.

Russia:

 I WAS ROBBED!!!

Not as exciting as it sounds but still very traumatic for me.

It was a process to get off the ship in St. Petersburg.  Unless you were going on a shore excursion, had a Russian passport or a visa from your home country, you were not allowed off the ship.   The company made 'shore excursions' for the crew meaning a shuttle from the port into St. Isaac's Square.  From there you could walk to The Church of the Spilt Blood, or get a 'cab' to where ever you wanted to go.  I say 'cab' because pretty much anyone with some room in their backseat and some extra time could and would be a cab for you.

Back to the robbery.

I was not forced at knife point into a alley and shaken down and all my money take from me and left with only my socks...
At some point, while walking around the well populated areas (I am not THAT stupid), someone very skillfully opened up the zipper pocket on my Old Navy back pack and removed my mini tri-pod for my camera and my hacky sac.

I warned you it was devastating.

Fortunately I had my passport in the interior portion of the pack and my cash and camera were in the front pockets.
Now, I am not that good at hacky sac (I have this thing were I am reluctant to practice in public for a fear of people mocking me...  Flashbacks to High School I guess), and I have a steady hand for photography so it is was not a major loss but I still felt violated and not in the good way...


I know this is going a bit long so:

To Be Continued